Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Questions about Adoption

One of the most common questions I get about adoption is, "How long did it take?".
My answer to this question is that it took our family 2 years from first contacting our agency in June of 2005 to the time we traveled in June of 2007 to complete our Special Needs Adoption and that if you wish for a non-special needs infant you will wait much longer. My answer always leads to other questions some I am very willing to answer, others I am not so eager to answer.
I always get the easy question of, "How old was she when you brought her home?". Well that is easy, she was 3 1/2. Then I get, "Oh, I didn't realize she was special needs. What is her special need?" I always answer with, "Her special need is not a visible one and to protect her privacy we don't really talk about it." Most people are okay with this answer and we leave it at that.

This leads me to a question of my own for other adoptive parents. When you are out and about in public are you offended if another adoptive parent comes and starts a conversation about adoption with you?

I am always a little hesitant to start the conversation, but when one is started with me I love talking about our adoption experience. We were so extremely blessed during the entire process that I don't mind at all talking to others about it. While we were on vacation during spring break we were at a restaurant when a couple walked in with three Asian children. I sat for about 15 minutes contemplating whether or not to go say hello to them. I feel such a kinship with other adoptive families. Finally I got up and went to say hello. They were so sweet. The girls all talked to A and I and the younger one and A were both from Guangxi. It was a very pleasant exchange, but I always wonder if other families feel as I do about the kinship or if they would rather not be approached.

1 comment:

  1. Hi Regina! I am FINALLY trying to catch my breath this spring and visiting some blogs and it is such a joy to see how much Amilynn has grown and blossomed! & I also LOVE it when other adoptive families want to talk and share stories. When we were at the visitation for Rick's father last month, the funeral home director came to visit with us because they also have several daughters from Korea and China, including one from Guangxi as well!

    I'm usually a bit more cautious when other families approach, esp if the girls are there with us when they start the conversation.

    Have a wonderful weekend!